Saturday, October 17, 2009

It's not the Destination...

They say that it's not the destination that's important so much as the journey. I'm not exactly sure who "they" are, but I'm positive that I ought to be included in the group, as it's a view that I've absorbed as part of my nature since "becoming Kiki" almost 2 years ago. Recently, a couple of related questions have been pinching me in the back of my psyche, like: What if the journey truly does suck and the destination is worth giving pause for a decade or two? Can you ever really appreciate a journey while you're in the middle of it if you're destination is worthwhile enough to keep you traveling? Is there actually a destination, or is every stop just a scenic pullout in life's grand route?

I've been fantasizing recently about winning the lottery...about a lot of other things too, but the lottery is something I'm actually willing to write about. I wonder what I'd change if money was no issue. I think about how I'd approach life if I had more time to "journey" and less concern about "destination". I was surprised to figure out that my journey is not as much about the money in my pocket as it is about the avoidance of couldashouldawoulda. I don't want to look back at my life and feel like I could have been so much more if only I would have _____ . My journey right now is about taking every path simultaneously and seeing everything I can see, so that *I know* I lived willingly and on purpose. I want my children to know that I was the pilot of my own life and that wherever I end up I got there deliberately. At the same time, I want them to grow up believing that they can steer their own lives in any direction, regardless of where they were when they took the wheel.

Journey? Destination? Who cares? Experiences are experiences no matter where you have them.